Last week, I realized that a latte is milk and a shot of espresso. As a college student and daily visitor of Starbucks, I’m sort of embarrassed that it took me this long to realize that my caffeine fix is basically just a glass of milk.

I’ve recently become super health conscious — I’m now that obnoxious person that orders a lettuce wrap at Jimmy John’s instead of bread — so upon realizing that I was essentially drinking caffeinated warm milk with added sugar I thought, “There must be a better way.”

So for the sake of journalism, and because I drink Starbucks every day, I decided to find out if there was a healthier alternative to my coffee habit.

The most obvious way to cut out unhealthy caffeine would be just to sleep more. But this is America, damn it, and sleep is for the weak. Plus, I get headaches if I don’t drink something caffeinated every day.

I thought about replacing my Starbucks coffee with Diet Coke. After all, it’s calorie-free. But whenever I drink Diet Coke, I can’t help but worry I’m drinking watered down jet fuel. I looked it up, and although there’s no jet fuel, artificial sweeteners like aspartame found in diet soda can dull your senses over time and trigger insulin which makes your body go into fat storage mode, according to health .com. It can also erode your teeth, among other bad side effects if you drink it regularly. Cross Diet Coke off my list of daily coffee substitute.

5-hour Energy was another option. Those little bottles only have four calories, zero sugar and as much caffeine as a cup of coffee, according to its website. The last time I had a 5-hour Energy, I was a junior in high school, and my mom found the empty bottle in the trash and grounded me. She thought I was experimenting with drugs. Now that I’m an adult, though, I figured I could get away with drinking what I wanted. Before deciding to leave my Starbucks habit in the past, I wanted to know how much caffeine 5-hour Energy had compared to normal coffee.

In 2012, Forbes  did a piece about the safety of energy drinks after the U.S. Food and Drug Administration released a report on potential energy drink-related deaths and hospitalizations. The article broke down why consumers should and should not be afraid of drinking 5-hour Energy. According to the article, one 2 fluid ounce bottle has about 215 milligrams of caffeine, which is actually less caffeine than a grande Starbucks regular brewed coffee, which averages 330 milligrams of caffeine.

It contains a number of vitamins and amino acids, including the amino acid phenylalanine that is found in aspartame. The side effects are the same as any caffeinated beverage, including increased heart rate, nausea, tremors and anxiety. But it seems the biggest danger of 5-hour Energy is that because it is so concentrated, it’s easy to accidentally overdose on caffeine by drinking five shots in a row. Its biggest downfall is that it tastes like expired cough syrup, so I’ll just use it as a last resort.

Green tea is often brought up as a calorie-free, not dangerous alternative to coffee. But although it has caffeine, it only has 24–45 miligram of caffeine per 8 ounces. Eight ounces of coffee can have 75–150 miligram. Though green tea has other benefits, it just doesn’t have enough caffeine to be a suitable substitute for coffee, unless you’re one of those blessed people that get nine hours of sleep a night and doesn’t need a lot of caffeine.

In the end, overpriced, over-sugared coffee is one of the few things I can count on for daily happiness. And actually, I found out that having a latte with whole or 2 percent milk can keep you feeling full for longer and is a good source of calcium. Aspartame can’t do that.

Maybe life isn’t just about the number of calories you consume in a day — rather, it’s about the nutritional value of what you consume and how it makes you feel. So after a search for the healthiest caffeinated drink, I decided to keep living my life the exact same way and continue selling my soul to Starbucks. Cheers.

Kate Beckman is a sophomore magazine journalism major. Her column appears every week in Pulp. You can reach her at kebeckma@syr.edu or follow her on Twitter at @Kate_Beckman.

Published on March 18, 2015 at 12:01 am