Everyone’s all too familiar with Coach Carr’s famous words from “Mean Girls.”

“Don’t have sex, because you will get pregnant and die.”

Personally, it’s one of my all-time favorite quotes and something that I often tell my younger cousins to scare them. I’m kidding — but not really.

The point is, his words remain some of the most infamous of our generation because they’re just so ridiculous. Yes, you might get pregnant from irresponsible, unprotected sex. However, the dying part is a little — note, very — inaccurate. But still, farfetched sayings and myths often stick with us and are there to give us a good laugh when we need one.

Here are a couple I’m sure you have all heard once or twice: “The first time you have sex will be perfect and magical, just like in the movies,” “Eating carbs makes you fat” — the list goes on.

Science is quick to debunk most of the sex and health myths that have long been ingrained in us. Sometimes though, scientific revelations seem to be more baffling than believable. Paying tribute to the wonderful world of science, here are some recent sex and health discoveries that seem more fiction than fact, but are actually true.

The Cool: Alcohol consumption can help you live longer

Here’s something to make you feel a little better about that post-Thanksgiving beer belly: research led by a psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin discovered that moderate drinkers often outlive their non-drinking counterparts. Seeing as how we’re in college and “moderate” drinking is almost nonexistent, it’s also good to know that even heavy drinkers lived longer than people who abstained from it completely. Another shot, please?

The Interesting: Semen keeps you healthy

Five points if a guy has ever told you semen is good for your skin. Five more points if he’s told you it can double as a protein supplement. Now, one more can be added to that playbook: semen apparently helps you live longer. According to a study recently published by Nature Medicine, spermidine, the chemical that’s present in sperm, was found to prolong the lifespan of mice as it helped lower their blood pressure. Before you start guzzling all the semen you can get, the study did note that you would have to consume a whole lot of it — like ounces of it — to get even the slightest benefit from spermidine. Better luck next time, boys.

The Strange: Teenage blood might be the key to eternal youth 

Earlier this month, at the Society for Neuroscience’s annual meeting in California, a scientist revealed that blood from teenagers helped turn back the clock for older mice. Blood plasma from youngsters was injected into the rodents and almost-rejuvenating results could be seen as it improved their memory, cognition and even physical activity. Before you pull an Edward Cullen on a classmate, keep in mind that positive results were only visible in older mice, and their younger counterparts actually experienced signs of brain aging. This finding is now being tested to treat people with Alzheimer’s disease.

The Disappointing: Male birth control

Ask any woman about getting her period and she’d tell you about all of her wonderful monthly experiences: mood swings, muscle aches, acne breakouts and a fluctuation in sex drive, just to name a few. Yet these exact symptoms were the reason why a recent study on a hormonal birth control shot for men was terminated, even though it was proven to prevent unwanted pregnancy by 96 percent.  Thanks to 20 of the 320 men who dropped out of this experiment, male birth control might still take a while to hit the shelves.

Lydia Chan is a senior magazine major. Her column appears weekly in Pulp. You can reach her at lychan@syr.edu. 

Published on November 30, 2016 at 8:31 pm