Syllabus week is over, and it was a perfect time to see the people you haven’t seen in a month, catch up on all that sleep you missed during the break or plan your trip home based off your last final. And why not? You’re not expected to go to class and pay attention. You get a lot of props for doing even just one of them.

But not for me. I’ve been a part of four syllabus weeks and I’ve studied hard for each one. It’s paid off because I learned a lot, and you missed it all. And, so you don’t have to ask me for my notes, I’ll just give them to you — but I expect your notes for the rest of the semester. Deal?

First off, when you actually pay attention during syllabus week, it can be really intimidating. Here’s a document with all your work for the next four months, and you’re going to get five of them in the span of around 48 hours. Have fun organizing the 17 tests, 11 papers, and 230 readings onto your dollar-store desk calendar. If that doesn’t drive you into a crying-coma, then I envy you.

One of the most important things that you’ll hear in every class you take — and I assure you it’s every class — is not to plagiarize. If for some reason your professors don’t have a section on plagiarizing in their syllabus, email me to prove me wrong at academicintegrity@syr.edu. But you won’t have to because every teacher has a section about plagiarism. Like, the exact same section about plagiarism. It’s almost like it was copied from somewhere, but I’m not sure where.

If you don’t show up to class on the first day of syllabus week, picking seats is difficult. First off, you can’t come too early because you’re the only person sitting in the class. That means making awkward eye contact with the teacher and the obligation to sit in the front. Showing up too late means getting stuck in the front. Plus, you’re probably not able to sit with your friends. Showing up the right amount of time early is the priority, especially if you want to be able to pretend like you’re paying attention.

The most important thing you’ll find out isn’t on paper — it’s finding out what type of teacher you have. Is this teacher like what the students from 2009 said on ratemyprofessor.com? If they started off class with, “You must have the book by next class,” or “I don’t curve anything,” consider throwing a tomato. If they start off with “I don’t believe in grading and tests,” consider bribing the teacher to also take on the department head job for your major.

Lastly, the most difficult thing that we all face is figuring out whether or not we can use a laptop. There’s no general consensus as to technology in the classrooms. Laptops, phones, tablets, iPads, Kindles, Kindle Fires and pagers all have specific places in some classrooms and not others. How am I supposed to know that I’m not supposed to pull out my Firefly prepaid mobile phone in class? There’s nothing on the syllabus saying I can’t.

You just better hope it’s on Blackboard.

Josh Feinblatt is a sophomore television, radio and film major. He thinks any teacher that puts a required texts section on his or her syllabus when there are no required texts is the MVP. He can be reached on Twitter @joshfeinblatt or through email at jfeinbla@syr.edu.

Published on January 22, 2017 at 9:28 pm