The Daily Orange's December Giving Tuesday. Help the Daily Orange reach our goal of $25,000 this December


Humor

DeBaise: Syverud to become campus’ new ‘Uber White Guy’

For anyone who has ever watched a black comedian, from Eddie Murphy to Dave Chappelle, Katt Williams to Kevin Hart, you all will remember fondly one of the most hilarious parts of their sets: their white man impression.

It’s really a staple of the genre — it’s the incredibly awkward, tragically un-hip, trying-too-hard-to-be-urban businessman, or father, or school principal. And the best part of these sets is something that the comedians undoubtedly realize: everyone has a white man in their lives who is uncannily similar to this caricature.

Such a hysterically over-the-top man has recently come into the lives of all Syracuse University students: the new chancellor, Kent Syverud.

Chancellor Syverud has several of the familiar symptoms of this character; we will call it the “Uber White Guy.” He is just leaning over the edge of middle-aged, he is unstoppably cheerful and optimistic and he just wants to be the cool older guy who all the kids trust.

The Uber White Guy wants to be the everyman: hip to the jive of all the street youths these days. He maybe has some really out of context NWA lines memorized that he likes to pull out at dinner parties, which do little other than make people uncomfortable and confused.



And here we have the new chancellor, maxin’ and relaxin’ down at Brewster, Boland and Brockway with all of the students, and making statements about how he is just fascinated to learn about all of the things these crazy kids are doing after midnight. This dude is one awkward pop culture reference away from getting himself invited to a frat party and facing the business end of a hangover before he has to go meet the cool new startup founders the next morning.

I’m going to go out on a limb and make this prediction: By the end of 2014, nay, the end of this semester, a cringe-worthy photo will emerge involving chancellor Syverud involved in some kind of fist-bump, or inappropriately fly handshake scenario with a student. You heard it here first.

Although, Syverud might not be a purebred of the stereotype (think Michael Scott from “The Office”) because he channels some other famous characters, namely Rebecca Black. The new chancellor’s recent school-wide email read like the opening lines of Black’s cyber hit-slash-flop “Friday,” listing all of his day’s activities in great detail for the general public.

I can honestly say I have about the same level of interest in what student group the chancellor dined with on the first day of classes as I do in what seat Black ended up taking in her high school buddy’s inexplicably fancy sports car.

But here’s the question we must ask ourselves as the student body: Is this such a bad thing? I, for one, think it might be a triumph for Syracuse University.

The Uber White Guy is always one of the most hilarious bits in a comedian’s set, and I would love to get an in-person show of such a ridiculous character. Sprinkle in a little Rebecca Black and you have one weird notion of a man, who is bound to be entertaining for his entire tenure.

He even has some elements of another Uber White Guy, who is also a by-product of SU, America’s most lovable maniac: Vice President Joe Biden. The vibe is certainly there — that happy-go-lucky old man with a sort of twinkle in his eyes that suggests a strange dark side lurking underneath.

He could either truly be the happiest man in politics (or amongst the SU faculty), or he could be an unstoppable psychopath. Only time will tell.

Until then, I say keep rockin’ in the free world, Chancellor Syverud. By all means, keep doing what you’re doing. If it feels right, go with it — if you think it will help you be a better chancellor to be the flyest white guy on campus, you should pursue that dream.

I’m not convinced it will work, but I am sure that it will keep me smiling.

Chelsea DeBaise is a senior writing major at Syracuse University. She first became aware that Uber White Guys existed outside of stand-up comedy when she realized her father was one. Her column will appear in her personal favorite section of The Daily Orange every week, Pulp, and she can be reached by email at cedebais@syr.edu or on Twitter @CDeBaise124.

 





Top Stories